They're Reuben Val the Wrong Way

The day after our closing on the sale of the Double Hovel flip house(s) was REUBEN DAY at the Senior Center! I had seen it on the monthly menu, but hadn't mentioned it to Hick, because we'd been a bit preoccupied with the closing. And getting our CHECKS! Good thing Hick realized there would be Not-Heaven to pay if he ever ate a Reuben and did not bring one home for Val.

Now there was a monkey wrench The Universe had great chortling joy tossing into our Reuben routine. And on the very day after the long-awaited sale of the Double Hovel. Oh, Universe! You're such a prankster! 

Hick had nowhere to keep the Reubens between the end of lunch at noon, and when he comes home at 5:00. It's a 20-minute trip. No longer can he stash those Reubens in the refrigerator(s) at the Double Hovel! Hick has taken the fridge out of Bargain House for remodeling. The only solution was leaving our Reubens at The Pony's house. Which was fine, because I was going by at 3:00 to pick up our CHECKS, which were also at The Pony's house. Catastrophe averted!

Anyhoo... when I eventually got home, Hick was already there, to carry in some groceries and the Reubens. The Reubens were in two white plastic grocery bags sent out by the Senior Center. Each bag contained a large white styrofoam box, and a small white styrofoam box of dessert on top. The bags were tied with approximately 1,033 knots apiece. Don't get me started! My mom used to tie up bags like that. What's the point? Are the contents going to escape like runaway socks in the dryer? A single half-knot should suffice.

Anyhoo... I had to cut open the bags while Hick was out in the yard/field mowing. To see my precious Reuben, and what came with it. Hick said he had ordered mine, and as he was leaving after lunch, the workers (Hick's gals) asked if he wanted one, too. Of course Hick did! I started with the desserts, because they were on top.

It was coconut cream pie. One of these things is not like the others! In fact, I think I am using the term "pie" loosely, in regard to the container on the right. 

I opened the sandwich container that had been under the broken pie:

Mmm! That Reuben Sandwich looked just fine. And there was double salad. It came with a squeeze pouch of ranch dressing.

Then I opened the container under the nice large slice of pie:

Hullo! What's this then? AN EXTRA HALF REUBEN!!! I smelled a rat! Not literally. I smelled a delicious Reuben (and-a-half). Yet there was only a semblance of salad. Something fishy is going on at the Senior Center!

Of course I quizzed Hick, after proclaiming that I was taking the extra half Reuben. That's only fair, right? Hick had eaten a full Reuben at lunch, and would now still have another full Reuben for supper. Plus he would have double salad. Hick doesn't get enough greens. AND I was giving him both desserts. I was doing Hick a favor, actually, by hijacking that extra half Reuben.

After we had eaten, I pointed out that those workers play favorites.

"Well. You can sure see how partial they are at the Senior Center. Imagine all those elderlies who get the take-out lunch, having a broken sliver of pie. And then YOU getting what looks like a double slice of pie! Plus an extra half sandwich. What was supposed to go in that other section?"

"Beets. It was beets. I know you don't like beets. That one was supposed to be yours."

"Yeah, sure. They gave me an extra half sandwich because...? No way was that container meant for me, with a giant slice of pie on top. And they know you don't eat your salad. All the other times, you've brought me beets and said you never had any idea I don't like beets."

"What can I say? The gals there like me. Oh, and they gave me the extra half sandwich. Because Maxine couldn't eat all of hers. She can never eat the full meal. So they asked if I wanted it, and I said yes."

So much is so wrong here! But I will gladly accept Maxine's leftover half Reuben, just like kids swapping out a school lunch to trade favorites, even though I had to steal it from Hick. 

I don't mind Hick getting The Favorite treatment from his gals, as long as it doesn't affect 

MY REUBEN! I hereby lay claim to any extra Reubenage in the future.