The Return of the OPC

Hick and The Pony carried my OPC (Old People Chair) up those 13 rail-less steps from the basement on Thursday. We are rearranging our living room. I have not used my OPC since my Unfortunate HospitVALzation back in January 2022. At first I was too weak to take those stairs. Then the state of my knees made me leery of falling.

Anyhoo... I now have my OPC in the living room, against the wall where Hick's recliner used to reside. Then there's the table next to it. And now Hick's recliner. The short couch that used to be in that place is under the living room window. It looks a little cramped over there, at a right angle to the long couch, with the coffee table now in front of the short couch.

I told Hick that maybe we should get rid of the short couch, and put in two of his "dentist chairs," the ones shown in his new office at the senior apartments. Sometimes you just want a nice sturdy cushioned chair to sit on, rather than a soft couch or a recliner. Such a chair is easier for me to arise from than a couch, since it's not as low. Same with Hick's recliner. I didn't sit in it, because it's lower, and my knees don't like to bend enough to get my feet under me to stand up. At least my OPC has that tilt thingy.

My OPC has a backup battery. That's great. I don't want to be trapped like a turtle on its back if the power goes off. I only had to make use of that once, back when the OPC was in the basement. Down there, my OPC controller was on a lamp table to my right, where the backup battery and wall outlet were. Now the outlet and battery are on my left. The cord runs under the OPC, and comes up on the right. Hick had it lying on the table between our chairs. 

I'm afraid that remote might drag off the back of the table, and fall where I can't reach it. So I set it in a little box of assorted stuff I keep on the table. Like pens, chapstick, bandaids, a nail file, a thermometer, etc. Stuff that should have a home of their own, but are more convenient to have right there.

Anyhoo... I mentioned to Hick that I was keeping the OPC remote there, to make sure it didn't fall down. Hick said haughtily...

"There's a pocket on the side of your chair to keep the remote in." 

Because, you know, he's the one who's been sitting in my OPC occasionally when he goes to the basement to watch the big screen TV.

I moved as if to reach my right hand down to that pocket. 

"Well. The only problem is that THERE'S A TABLE UP AGAINST MY CHAIR." 

I couldn't even fit a fingertip between them. Not that it matters. I don't need the table and Hick's recliner moved over. I'm fine with my remote sitting in that little box. It's just that Hick thinks he knows everything! And was trying to make me feel less-than by pointing out the (inaccessible) pocket.

That's a bold attitude from a guy who doesn't even know how to slice a baked potato.