Let the record show that Hick took the day off Monday due to his sickness. Of course, he announced his plans Sunday morning, a full 24 hours in advance. I suppose he was anticipating a relapse after spending the rainy 38-degree morning tromping around Shackytown with some work cronies, and feasting at the company Christmas dinner that evening.
Hick DID get up at 6:00 and drive 45 minutes to work to get his men started on projects, then drove 45 minutes home. He was back by 8:30, ready to hit the sack. Which meant I might as well get up an hour early (!) for my usual routine. I got ready to do the Walmart shopping. Right after I stepped out of the shower, Hick's phone started ringing. He leaves it plugged in on the bathroom counter.
"Hey! Do you want to answer this? It's [NAME REDACTED]. Whoever that is."
"Yeah. I'll take it."
I carried the phone to Almost-Sleeping Not-Beauty. Seems it was a guy from work asking what he was supposed to do. Hick went back to bed, with his phone on the nightstand. I left him wearing his breather with the quilt pulled over his face. But not for long! Once outside petting the pups, I noticed that I had forgotten my jacket. So I started back in. I could have sworn I heard the house phone ringing. Yet when I opened the door it was not. I checked to be sure, and it showed a missed call. Which happened to be Hick's pharmacy.
"Hey! The phone just rang and you didn't answer. It was your pharmacy. Do you want to call them?"
"No. I don't know why they would call me. They'll call back if it's important."
"Do you want me to put the phone beside you? So you don't have to get up?"
"No. I'm good."
So I left him there. In bed. Breathered. Head covered. I was gone two and a half hours. I unloaded T-Hoe and put things away, and went to wake Hick. Because he had decreed that I was driving to town with him today to take his Ford F250 Long Bed Club Cab to get some work done. Something about a wiring harness or a coil. He really sounds like Charlie Brown's teacher when he tells me too many details. Some part that he would have to crawl under the truck and test six different wires to see which one was bad, and he'd have to buy the wires at $51 apiece, and he'd be out that money if it wasn't the one he thought. Because it probably wasn't all six of them. Anyhoo...I guess the thought of all that money in the bank account slipped his mind. Or else he really doesn't want to crawl up under the truck, because his BARn is full of his "collectibles" and he can't work on the vehicles there as he built it for.
Let the record show that I refused to split up my day for his convenience. I was not going to sit down and have lunch and get started on my internet timewasting and then have to drive back to town while my 44 oz Diet Coke got waterlogged by ice. So Hick had decided that after the shopping, we could go and drop off his truck and then get my magical elixir.
"Okay. I'm back. Are you ready to go to town?"
"Oh. I guess so. The phone rang FOUR TIMES! The pharmacy and work again because they told me they don't have enough material for this project, and I told them I ordered more than TWICE what they needed, and then they decided they measured wrong and really did have enough."
"What did the pharmacy want?"
"I don't know. I didn't answer them."
I swear. Hick is like Genius reaching into the dish drainer to get a short fork, and pulling out a long one, and putting it back, and pulling out a long one again, and putting it back, and then the third time deciding just to use the long one.
We dropped off the truck and headed for my soda. Except first we had to pick up a bacon cheeseburger for Hick at Dairy Queen, because he had a hankerin' for it. Then he decided to go into Orb K with me for a fountain soda. After his burger, he decided that maybe he didn't feel all that bad, and he'd maybe go do something. But I think mainly he watched Gunsmoke reruns and went to pick up the mail.
He complained that he didn't get much rest while he was home. He was preachin' to the choir!
Thankfully, Hick is going to work as usual tomorrow. I, for one, could use the rest. I just want to sit on the front porch with the dogs and enjoy the serenity of a Hickless homestead.