Wednesday, September 2, 2026

Et Tu, Machinery?

I bought some baby carrots for Hick to have with dip. You'd think it's a pretty simple side dish. I stir a packet of Hidden Valley Ranch Dip powder into a container of sour cream. Then I open a bag of baby carrots and rinse them off and pat them dry. Easy peasy. Several days of side dish.

I know that nobody runs a baby carrot farm. That you don't buy seeds to plant baby carrots. They are full-grown carrots that are cut and peeled and shaped by machines. I've never seen them on an episode of How It's Made, but I'm not an idiot. I'm sure you could find the process on YouTube if you wanted to see where baby carrots come from.

My bag of baby carrots looked just fine. Here's the other bag I bought at the same time:


Nothing unusual about that. Just baby carrots ready for chomping. I HOPE! Because there was something unusual in the first bag I opened.


That's no baby! It's more of an older, college brother. Thank goodness it wasn't a gnarled great grandaddy. I told Hick he could gnaw on it like Bugs Bunny, or I'd peel it and cut it up to go with the real babies. It's still in my Chinese Tupperware, so I guess I should get out my peeler.

How did this behemoth make it through to the end of the production line to get bagged? I would imagine there's some kind of sifter that lets a uniform size baby fall through. That would seem more economical than hiring PEOPLE to stand at a conveyor and toss out the giants. But what do I know? Maybe it's just another case of NOBODY DOING A JOB CORRECTLY.

Or maybe a case of a MACHINE not doing a job correctly.

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