The Discontinuing Adventures of Nick and Bev

Every now and then, I share a tale of Nick and Bev, our former Backcreek Neighbors. We've known them for at least 10 years, though I probably wouldn't recognize them on sight. About five years ago, they moved to the middler of nowhere. 

Hick has always been the one who communicates with them, as they use him as their personal handyman. They pay for his services. Hick usually puts them ahead of other jobs, and is willing to wait for payment if they ask to delay it until payday. I think the last time I wrote about them, Hick was on his way to do work on their house, but turned around to pick up Nick and give him a ride, since he had left his car in the shop, and said he was walking 26 miles home along hilly curvy blacktop county roads.

Anyhoo... the latest news is that Nick and Bev are moving to Israel. It seemed kind of an odd decision to me, but considering it's Nick and Bev, it really wasn't surprising. I don't know their reason. It's not my business. As The Pony replied when I told him this tale, "Huh. That's not really a safe area right now." My thoughts exactly. 

I don't know if it's religious, or business, or just a whim. They are Seventh Day Adventists, which I know because early on, Hick would say, "I won't have time until Sunday." And Bev would say, "No. That's my Sabbath. Can you do it on Sunday?" Which for some reason gives me a chuckle, though more of an insight into Bev's manner of thinking. As for it being a job opportunity, they are both retired military. Rick has been doing some kind of government work, which is in the technical field. Again, not my business. I'm just curious about why they chose that area to relocate.

Anyhoo... I came home last Sunday, and Hick was sitting at the cutting block counting his money from the SUS2.5. He didn't seem like his usual jovial, overbearing self.

"What's wrong with you?"

"I got called a USURY today! By Bev!" [Turns out it was Nick.]

"I'm somewhat familiar with the term. I don't think it's a NAME you call people. It's biblical. Like you're cheating somebody."

"I had to look it up on my phone! They was textin' me."

I could tell Hick had hurt feelings. That's MY job! Nobody else better be saying anything mean to my Hick! What in the Not-Heaven was going on? Of course Hick is not one to hold things in.

"You know Rick and Bev are moving to Israel. They're selling all their stuff to get money for the move. They asked if I could sell a log-splitter and air conditioner and tiller for them at my store. I said yeah, and they said they'd pay me 10% of what I sold.

Bev wanted $750 for the log-splitter. I told her a brand new one would go for that in a store, but hers is used and don't even work. So we agreed on $300. I bought it from them right there, because I have a small-engine guy who I think can fix it, and I can still make money on it.

They wanted $400 for the air conditioner. I called an old guy at the apartments, and he bought it for $400.

The tiller works. Bev said she'd take $350 for it. Her and Nick went walkin' around, lookin' at other stuff at the flea market. I thought that tiller would bring more, so I put $500 on it. A while later, Nick and Bev was talkin' to one of my buddies and mentioned they had me selling their tiller. He said something about he saw it, for $500.

Bev started texting me that she only wanted $350 for the tiller. That I was trying to make a 40% profit, when we had agreed on 10%. I texted back that even if I sold all three things, including the tiller at $500, that I would only be making a 14.2% profit. [No idea how either of them arrived at these figures, so no need for innernet mathies to correct me!] 

I was only trying to get them more money for their move. If the tiller didn't sell, I would have bought it from them myself. I knew I could sell it, even if not by the end of the day.

Then Nick starts textin' me. He said, "That's usury! God wouldn't want that." I told him I was just trying to get them more money, but if he didn't want me to sell his tiller, he could come get it. So he did. Just picked it up and left."

"Did they pay you the 10% for the wood-splitter and air conditioner?"

"NO! They didn't give me a penny!"

Heh, heh. I guess God would have been fine with THAT, reneging on a deal that was already made.

"Well. That's sad. But if I was you, I don't think I'd be answering any of their calls or texts. They can find somebody else to help them out before they move."

"Yep. I ain't answerin' nothin' from either one of 'em."

It's not the little bit of money from that 10% Hick didn't get. That's nothing to him. His feelings are hurt. He doesn't cheat people. He thought Nick and Bev were his friends. He's bent over backwards to help them, and they in turn have given him stuff over the years. Like their old flooring that he used in one of the flip houses, and wood from their deck. Hick didn't understand their anger towards him, over what he thought was doing them a favor. In the very least, Bev could have just said, "Put the tiller back at $350."

I bear Nick and Bev no ill will. I wish them safe travels and an uneventful life as they settle in Israel. But that's it. Nothing extravagant. My heart has hardened a bit. They should have treated Hick better.