Sometimes, you have to protect your children from themselves. Sometimes, it is not easy.
When Hick and Genius went on their Goodwill tour Saturday, they picked up a dozen Krispy Kreme donuts from the Lindbergh location. Not just your regular Krispy Kremes, but the kind with chocolate icing on top. Let the record show that Val does not like Krispy Kremes, and Hick cannot eat them. And for an addendum to the record, Val has ordered two dozen Krispy Kremes from the FCCLA fundraiser at school, due to be delivered this Friday.
The Pony stayed overnight Saturday with his grandma. Oblivious to the Krispy Kremes sitting all smug in their big flat box on the kitchen cutting block. Yesterday morning, while coercing Genius to put away his clean and folded laundry, a terrible truth came to light. It was just after Genius complained about putting away the clothes, and right before he refused to wash the dishes.
"Oh, what do you have planned to do that's so important?"
"Well, right now I plan to stuff my face with Krispy Kremes."
"I hope you're leaving half for your brother."
"Actually, I already ate more than half."
"It hasn't even been twenty-four hours yet!"
"I ate eight of them yesterday."
"That's not fair!"
"I figured they'd all be gone before he got home. What time is Grandma bringing him back?"
"Five o'clock."
"Oh, I have plenty of time."
"Leave him at least two."
"If I was him, I'd rather never know than realize that I'd been cheated out of four donuts."
"I can't believe you ate all those donuts."
"And I'm about to eat more."
"Your pancreas is packing up his belongings in a red bandana, tying it to a stick, and hitting the road."
"Heh, heh, heh. Funny." Genius shoved half a donut in his mouth.
"Seriously. That is SO not good for you."
"Oh, well." He finished the donut. Grabbed another one.
"Your pancreas weeps."
A single, solitary Krispy Kreme remained when The Pony returned. He saw the box. "Hey! Krispy Kremes!" Opened it. "Huh." Never did eat it. I suppose the disappointment was too much.
I used to be able to do that to a box of Krispy Kremes. Sadly, no more.
ReplyDeleteAny time I've ever seen organs--as in guts--they were revolting. No need to make things worse with a whole dozen krispy kremes. Pony knew there was Genius expectorations on that last donut.
ReplyDeleteKrispy Kremes are the ONLY doughnuts I eat, and sadly, I have to stay away from them. They are the bomb! (in many ways)
ReplyDeleteI guess that taught The Genius a lesson: Next time, eat ALL 12. There's no reason to crush The Pony by leaving just one...
One donut just isn't worth it.
ReplyDeleteNever ever offer me a Krispy Kreme. I'm like the boy, I will eat right down to the last one in the box.
ReplyDeleteJoanne,
ReplyDeleteHere's hoping you didn't have a little brother who had none. Or, even worse, ONE.
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Leenie,
I think you might have something there. I would not be surprised if Genius marked that last donut as his territory.
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Sioux,
Don't encourage Genius. I need to have a sign made up so I can post it at strategic locations.
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Stephen,
Ponies of a feather go without donuts together.
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Linda,
I'm afraid to see what might happen if somebody feeds you after midnight. You little gremlin.
He left him only one ........ Poor Pony. I have eaten a dozen donuts in one sitting before. Actually in bed. Pregnant with the twins. I have never tasted anything as good as those warm donuts at 2 in the morning when my EMT husband decided to come home and share his good fortune with his wife. Oh, the look of anmazement on his face while watching me eat all 12 donuts! Hey, that was for the three of us, so really I only had 4!
ReplyDeleteKathy,
ReplyDeleteThat's perfectly logical. The three of you shared a dozen donuts. Unlike Genius, who is not pregnant with twins. An is neither a sharer nor a carer.