Wednesday, May 10, 2017

What Jack Needs is a Good Lawyer

Hick has been working around Poolio for a couple of weeks, building a new deck. I can't go into all the details now, because that's going to be a special addition that I'm planning for you while I'm livin' the wild life during Casinopalooza 2.

I don't plan on taking my laptop this trip, because during the original Casinopalooza, I barely had a chance to open it up, what with so many casinos, so little time. You'll have a fresh post every day, but I won't catch up with comments until Tuesday night. My last communication will probably be Sunday morning.

Anyhoo...as with any project Hick has going on, there are always a few loose ends. Sometimes they never get tightened. He had to move everything off the old deck in order to rebuild it. So he put stuff down by the basement door, under the porch.

Last night I went out to talk to him over the porch rail. He had drained some water from the top of Poolio after the first big flood-producing rain, and finally got the cover off. Now the water level is a foot or two below the edge. I saw movement in Poolio, and told Hick,

"You have a frog in there."

"Yeah. I've had several."

"Well, you need to get him out. He'll drown. He's not made to live in the water for his whole life."

"I don't have my dip net."

"You don't need it. He's over by the filter. You can reach him with your hand. Where's your dip net?"

"Jack tore it up."

"How did JACK get a dip net?"

"It was on the bench seat that I put by the basement door. He got up on there and got it, I guess. I found it in the front yard, all chewed up."

"It's pretty long."

"So's Jack."

Huh. Jack DOES get into things. And I guess he COULD have carried a dip net around the house. I saw him in the front yard one day with a limb about 8 feet long. He had no trouble romping around with that.

But this morning, I found THIS in the driveway.


I guess it's something Hick trimmed off when he was moving Poolio's filter closer to the new deck. I sent Hick a picture asking if it belonged to him, and he said,

"Looks like your dog got into things again."

Au contraire. I don't think Jack's mouth is big enough to grab that hose. He's got a tiny mouth. I even have to cut up the food for his evening snack.



And...it was the neighbor dog, Copper, who was discovered laying closest to the contraband. Yes, Copper DOES have a head. But in the way of the guilty dogs when they know you want a picture, he made sure we couldn't see his face.


Jack was not near it. Not near Copper, either. Just minding his own business over by the porch.


I guess we'll never know who took that hose. I threw it up on top of Hick's Olds Toronado. You know. The one he accused Jack of jumping up on and taking a crap on the trunk.

16 comments:

  1. I need a dog to deflect all the blame I get around the house.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. fishducky,
      Poor Joe had a SQUIRREL, and where is HE now?

      Delete
    2. Joe,
      You might be able to blame the snack-eating on a dog, but I don't think a dog would use scissors from the wrong room, or scrub the silverware with the potato brush.

      However...if you DO get a dog, you can name him JERK!

      Delete
  2. Val--At our house, my PITA is NEVER flatulent. It's always the dog (according to him).

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. A DOG, you say? Around here, it's always the FROGs. Snap your head around at the first sound, before the odor even arrives, and you'll be informed, "Frogs are bad tonight."

      Delete
  3. Gus always looks guilty, I'm not sure he's ever done anything wrong in his life but he's always ready to take the blame.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Dogs ARE man's best friend, you know.

      Delete
  4. My Winston never claims responsibility...even when the evidence is in his mouth.

    Pat
    www.patwahler.com

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Well, then...he's very smart, and/or very charismatic!

      Delete
  5. My dog never does anything wrong either, I'm willing to bet Jack is innocent, he had no problem looking at the camera, it's always the guilty that hide their faces.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. If only you could take the bench in Canine Court, then Jack could waive his right to a jury trial.

      That piece of hose was right back in the same place in the driveway when I returned from town TODAY! It was on the trunk of the Toronado when I left. Hick said, "Yeah. He got up there and got it!"

      Delete
  6. Not Jack. Just look at his expression. And what's with the shock of seeing a headless dog? You are going to do me in!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Jack thanks you for the vote of confidence.

      You're lucky I didn't have a camera when I saw that headless man in my basement, or you'd REALLY be done in!

      Delete
  7. Jack looks innocent to me, perhaps a little put out that anyone would blame him for such things!

    ReplyDelete