Hick Advises From Afar

Hick called the next day to talk me off the ledge. I was a bit upset over single-handedly being responsible for the impending death of Poolio. Since I couldn't move the lever or find an OFF button, I was relegating to watching Poolio gurgle his last breath as his filter clogged before Hick returned. Thank goodness Hick called on the landline while I was in the house. So I didn't get disconnected. Which is not to say the call was a success...

 

"I just don't know what to do. I can't move the lever."

 

"It looks like it's in the right place, in the picture you sent."

 

"So I'm already backwashing?"

"No. It's in the place it's supposed to be. Where I left it."

"But the lever is at BACKWASH."

 

"The LEVER. You need that little thing on the other side to be at backwash."

"WHAT? That nub?"

"Yeah."

"Well, I can't get the lever to move."

"You have to push down on it until the nub lifts out and you can turn it."

"I know how a nub works. I can't lift it up."

"All you do is turn off the pump and push down on the handle and it will turn."

"WAIT! I have to TURN OFF the pump first!"

"Yeah. That's how it works. It won't turn unless the pump is off."

"You might have told me that to start with."

"The Pony knew. He said he knew how to do it."

"He never once told me to turn it off!"

"That's all you need to do. It will be okay until I get back. Just turn off the pump."

"How am I going to do THAT? There's no switch. And no breaker."

"There's a switch, Val. It's a toggle switch on the back of the pump."

"The BACK? It's ROUND. I've looked all around it, and can't find it."

"Not that part. The PUMP."

"It IS the pump! The black thing I'm trying to move the lever on is the pool pump."

"No. The pump is the long thing on the left."

"How was I supposed to know THAT?"

"Everybody knows what a pump looks like!"

"Not everybody!"

"Just turn off the switch on the back of the pump. You won't have to worry about it."

"I said I can't find it!"

"Then unplug it."

"NO! I don't want to get electrocuted!"

"You won't get electrocuted. Just use two hands and pull out the plug."

"There's black electrical tape on it. No. I'm not doing that."

"Then look for the switch on the back of the pump."

 

"Okay. The BACK? You mean on the pool side?"

"No. On the back."

"The pool side IS the back. As I'm standing here looking at it. Tell me: Is it on the pool side, the house side, the neighbor side, or the chicken pen side?"

"It's on the BACK!"

"Stop it! Tell me which side!"

"Right in front of you. If you kneel down, you'll see the switch!"

"KNEEL DOWN? That won't happen."

"Put your hand down on the back of the pump, and you'll feel the toggle switch!"

"The BACK? Which SIDE? By the pool? Or by the house?"

"By the house! The BACK!"

What in the Not-Heaven??? I was trapped in a Who's On First routine! I told Hick I would deal with it later. When I got back from town, I went out the basement door and stuck my phone down by the FRONT of the pump, and took a picture:

 

After viewing the pic, I reached down, felt the switch, and turned it OFF. That's the picture I provided. Not the original, blurry from the humidity on the lens, that showed me the switch location. What an awkward place to put a switch! Where you can't see it unless you stand on your head. Although The Pony, when consulted, said that most people probably have their pump mounted higher than ankle level.

In addition, The Pony feigned ignorance of the "turning off the pump before moving the lever" issue. But he was quick to admonish me, when viewing my pictures from Poolio-side:

"Mom. You can see right there on the lever! It says 'DO NOT CHANGE POSITION WITH PUMP ON.' So it's really your fault. Not mine or Dad's."

The Pony needs to realize who waits on him hand and broken foot...

 

 

Anyhoo... Poolio didn't get a backwash. He's just sitting stagnant until Hick returns.