There Must Be a Shop Somewhere That Can Recalibrate My Weirdo Magnet

If wishes were horses, beggars would ride. And those beggars who are weirdos would ride all up in Val's business, with impunity! I swear, I can't seem to disable my weirdo-magnetry. No matter where I am, there THEY are!

Friday, I was standing at the Country Mart deli, waiting for my shrimp and chicken strips to have a price sticker slapped on them. An old man hobbled up to stand in front of my cart. I figured I could use it in a cow-catcher-y kind of way, if need be. The guy looked like you would image a prospector in an old movie, or on the graphics of a slot machine like Wild Wild Nugget. White hair, kind of stooped over, dressed appropriately for gold-panning.

Miner Weirdy-FindHer bent over to look at the packs of chicken already trayed up. I backed my cart, in case he wanted to see what else was in the counter. He did not. When the guy brought my food, Miner Weirdy-FindHer asked, "How much are your chicken legs? A dollar?" The deli guy said, "No, they're $1.29."

I left them there, and went to look at the $1 chip end-cap. Got The Pony some ridged Sour Cream and Onion chips. Some Corn On the Cob flavored popcorn for Hick. Then I went across the back aisle to the produce section, for some tomatoes on the vine.

Of course you guessed that Miner Weirdy-FindHer appeared on the other side of the table, looking at tomatoes. I bagged up a vine, and left him there. I proceeded around the back of the next aisle to get some Famous Amos boxed cookies for The Pony. I got Hick a $1 cup of Chips Ahoy. No, he shouldn't have them, but it was a limited quantity of mini-cookies.

I went on up that aisle to find myself some Frosted Animal Cookies. And there was Miner Weirdy-FindHer, with his cart, peering across my own cart at the cookies.

"Oh. You're going to think I'm following you..."

"Sorry. I seem to be in the way no matter where I go!" (I've learned that you don't poke a weirdo. Let them think you find their behavior "normal.") 

"Oh, you're not in MY way. I thought I was in YOUR way." (Said Miner Weirdy-FindHer, having the nerve to humor me like my behavior was normal!) 

"No. You're not in my way. There! I'm going now, so you can see the cookies."

I did not turn around to see if he was following me to the baking aisle. I made it out without seeing him again. Funny how things panned out...