Tuesday, February 25, 2014

I'm Batty, You're Batty, We're All Batty for a Big Daddy!

My mom wants a Big Daddy. She's been longing for one all week.

There's snow in the forecast on Friday. That could interfere with our monthly trip to fork over my house payment. You know, in the town where all the magic happens. Where Mom pirouettes about Arby's, flashing a bit of flesh, informing the masses that she never goes out like this, and she is so embarrassed that she has a hole in the knee of her gray sweatpants.

I called Mom to suggest that maybe we should change our trip to Thursday. "The Pony can't come. He has an academic meet far, far away. I thought you might want to go in Arby's and eat a Reuben. Have you been seeing those commercials? I know how fond you are of Reubens."

"Well...what I would really like is a Big Daddy! I was going to ask you if we could pick one up for me when you let me ride along. All week I've been seeing the Big Daddy on TV. Piled high with all kinds of stuff. And chicken, too! They're on the Rally's commercial, and it just really looks good to me."

It's the least I can do, right? What if the snow comes Friday, and Mom can't get out of her driveway for ten days? At least she can live off the fat from her Big Daddy.

Today Mom went to pick up her recently-widowed sister-in-law from the nursing home, to take her to visit an old friend in another nursing home. They were going to do that last week, and also view an annual art show at the second nursing home, but signs were taped to the door warning of "stomach flu." The outing was tabled until that facility could convalesce its home back to a good bill of health. It just happens to be located in the bill-paying town.

I certainly hope Mom did not grab a Big Daddy without my supervision.


  1. I hear there's slaw on the Big Daddy. Right?

    Or maybe that's a sandwich that hasn't been offered yet. I wonder what the name of THAT sandwich would be...

  2. I'll bet she could do back to back Big Daddy's.

  3. How you gonna keep 'em down home when there's Big Daddys and art shows to check out. It's so weird to see how we become the worried parents and the parents revel in becoming irresponsible kids again.

  4. Grandma goes rogue, now there's a story for you. Turn her loose and start writing.

  5. Sioux,
    No slaw on the Big Daddy. But funny you should mention that. I can't believe I didn't see Mom's addiction way back in childhood. For a year, we lived in Poplar Bluff. Yes. The famous fictional hometown of Charlene Frazier and Carlene Dobber. A favorite restaurant destination for Mom and Dad was some kind of BBQ drive-in that served up pulled pork sandwiches WITH SLAW INSIDE! Years later, if we were passing through, they had to get a bag of sandwiches.

    Maybe if there was an interval of 24 hours between Daddys. Remember, this is the old gal who buys three grilled onion cheddar burgers at a time, and puts two in the freezer for later. You can take Mom out of the Great Depression, but you can't take the Great Depression out of Mom.

    I haven't had to hold her hand crossing the road, yet.

    Somehow, I imagine her sitting in the living room since Monday, with her coat on, purse on her lap, looking out her picture window for me to PULL INTO THE DRIVEWAY tomorrow afternoon.

  6. I wish I could go get my Mama and Daddy and take them out for whatever they wanted. I miss them. I sent my dad a device that he can hook up to his TV and then scan the paper newspaper he is so fond of and actually be able to see it. So, I call and ask him if he received the package. Knowing he should have gotten it the week before, I was curious about how it was working for him. He hasn't hooked it up yet ....... He is really excited about it, though. He has not set up his notebook I took him last August! Gotta love 'em!

  7. Kathy,
    That is SO typical of how they react to the newfangled gifts.