Today I read an article that said dogs are more likely to steal food if they think they are not being watched by people. My reaction? "And...?"
Don't dog people already know that? Without need of a scientific study?
Every evening I open the garage door when I'm halfway down the driveway. My feisty dog Juno runs down off the porch, wagging her feathery black tail, wiggling with pleasure, and shoots under that door as soon as there is enough room for her wiry body. I make my 90-degree turn and pull in, and there's Juno bent over the roasting pan of dry cat food. As soon as I put the Tahoe in PARK, Juno reappears on the porch. I can see her through the glass of the garage people-door.
Butter wouldn't melt in that dog's mouth. She acts all glad to see me, like she has not got cat food on her breath. If I close the big metal door as soon as I pull in, trapping Juno in the garage with me, she stands beside the cat food pan. "See? It's me! Your loving doggie! Happy to see you back home again! What...THIS? It seems the felines have eaten their fill. I'm just investigating. You might want to feed them less. Because there's FOOD IN THIS PAN! I'm just telling you. It's not like I'm eating it, you see. That's CAT food. And I'm a dog. Not a cat. I'm just standing here. I seem to be trapped inside this structure. I really want to be out there on the porch. I ran in momentarily to greet you, you see. And I simply noticed this--what do you call it--roasting pan with cat food inside. Don't that just beat all? I mean, imagine, four cats, and still food left here. That's wasteful. You'll never catch me and my dog brother and sister letting food go to waste like that! If you need to dispose of it, well, I will volunteer to clean it up. Just let me know."
Uh huh. Juno knows I can't jump out and scold her until the car is stopped. She straightens up at that instant. We might as well have a study to prove that teachers wish for snow days between December and March.
Heck I steal food when I'm not being watched. We don't need a study to tell us this is true with dogs.
ReplyDeleteSome dogs eat faster whe they are caught because they know they will be punihed anyway.
ReplyDeleteMarch? What about April? There are stories about freaky snow storms blizzarding their way through in April.
ReplyDeleteHold onto as much hope as you can. Believe in April, too.
And indoor cats don't climb on countertops when not being watched. You are an observant scientist. Snow day? What's that?
ReplyDeleteToo bad we can't get paid for all our common sense like the people who get grants to tell us what we already know. As for dogs telling lies--yeah, but they smile so pretty.
ReplyDeleteStephen,
ReplyDeleteIf you keep seeing food laying around unattended, and the lights dim several times and then go off...you might be the subject of a study. Forewarned is forearmed, my friend.
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joeh,
Yeah, they want to push that envelope. Like kids on go-karts when the college student tells them to pull into the parking line at The Track.
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Sioux,
I am ever the realist. Not a dreamer such as yourself. If my hope can't conjure up snow deep in the heart of February, it is the namby-pamby loser that does not deserve an April snow day.
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Linda,
I, too, must ask, "Snow day? What's that?" Because we haven't had one in so long, I'm kind of forgetting the euphoria they bring.
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Leenie,
Too bad we can't get paid a regular salary while only being right when pigs fly. Yes. Everybody go to meteorologist school and land a gig as a TV weatherman. The meteorologist school is optional if you are young, female, and blond.
I bet studies would show teachers wish for snow days starting from the second week of school, but that magic door only opens at certain times, too. And no scientist wants to spend that much time with a teacher to find out.
ReplyDeleteTammy,
ReplyDeleteAin't THAT the truth! We are fortunate to have a cantankerous pump on one of the town's water supply facilities. We generally get a surprise NO WATER day once a year. Haven't had one yet.