Seriously, I Can't Help Myself

Less than 24 hours after letting go of Genius's package, I was at it again.

This morning I grabbed a couple of packets of mild sauce from Taco Bell off the kitchen counter as The Pony and I headed out the door. My lunch was at school, left over from yesterday, because I am crafty like that, and refuse to pack lunch for two days when one day will suffice. It was actually some hamburger left over from big fat burritos I made Sunday, with some shredded cheddar and Save A Lot salsa, accompanied by some Scoops left over from Super Bowl Sunday. Let the record show that if my presence disappears from the internet, I have probably succumbed to food poisoning.

I tossed those packets of taco sauce into my shirt pocket. No need to shove them down in my school bag and risk an explosion, like that time I snagged a few ketchup packets from the bowling alley and dropped them in my coat pocket, along with the car keys, only to have Genius walk behind my chair when getting ready to leave, and step on that pocket as it hung to the floor from my chair back. In the car this morning, I took the taco sauces out of my pocket, and set them on T-Hoe's console so that if I had a collision, the emergency personnel would not think I needed a transfusion.

Once at school, as I was pulling into my parking space, and The Pony was gathering our educational accouterments, I put the taco sauce packets back into my shirt pocket.

"Gotta remember my taco sauce. Because I'm feelin' SAUCY today!"

Let the record show that I enunciated that word SAUCY much like Freaky Fred in the old Courage the Cowardly Dog episode where he shaved everything in the house, including Courage and Muriel. Here's a little taste: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2ibGU0EnksY.

I looked in the rearview mirror to see how The Pony was taking it. He had his head down, palm to forehead, and began to speak.

"You don't know how much effort this is taking not to do 'Sad Bird.'

Which of course is his reference to the little glowing bluebird in Journey to the Center of the Earth, who bends his head down and sadly shakes it from side-to-side when Josh Hutcherson in his pre-Hunger Games role, bungles jumping from one magnetic boulder to the next, and is adrift on a runaway rock at the top of a bottomless chasm. Try to keep up with the kid shows and movies, won't you? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h34QnEUfzfw

"What? You find it disturbing?"

"Uh huh."

"But I feel SAUCY!"

"Ack. I'm going in."

As soon as I got in the building, I looked down the hall to find The Pony at his locker. As he walked back toward me, I smirked. He looked worried. I turned toward the main entrance, and saw his friend Curly coming from the other direction. I took the packets of taco sauce out of my pocket and shook them toward The Pony.

"Do you know how I feel?"

"Yes!"

"Do you want me to say it here?"

Curly was fast approaching.

"NO!"

"Hey! Mrs. Thevictorian! Do you mind if I put my lunch in your fridge today? Since I walk by with The Pony on our way to lunch anyway?" He held up a big salad. I'm not sure who bought it, or who got credit.

"Oh. Go right ahead."

The Pony entered the room with Curly. Not giving me a chance to explain my taco sauce, I suppose. He chattered like a people person. I held in my SAUCINESS.

I have to keep something in reserve.