Well. Not only did The Universe tattle on Val to Even Steven concerning her (inadvertent) crime of stealing two six-packs of Diet Mountain Dew... but it also levied an unpleasant penalty on our (mostly) innocent Val!
Monday, I went in Country Mart while over in Sis-Town at the bank. I picked up Hick's Little Debbie Zebra Cakes, and saw that Diet Mountain Dew was on sale 3-for-$11. They even had it on the shelf! So I BOUGHT three six-packs. Paid for all three!!!
Once home, I opened up T-Hoe's rear to retrieve one to carry in the house. What I saw was a punishment from The Universe for my (accidental) thieving ways.
One of the Diet Mountain Dew six-packs had turned over. It happens all the time. But this one was LEAKING!
What in the NOT-HEAVEN??? I got a stack of Puffs Plus Lotion from up front, and tried to sop up part of the mess. At least it was diet soda, so not a sticky stain. I set that six-pack on the metal chair on the side porch. I noticed that one of the middle bottles was almost empty of liquid.
Of course Hick came up the driveway as I was climbing the steps with the grocery bag and a box of my own Diet Shasta Cola. He has a knack for arriving right after I've carried everything in. As I was setting that stuff down, the kitchen door open to gave my dogs a treat, here came Hick carrying that six-pack of soda.
"Don't bring that in here! It's leaking! Take out the leaky bottle."
Hick's solution was to set the whole thing on top of my Dear Departed Juno's dog house. You know, because it's easier to let ME take it apart and bring it in later.
When I went to look at it closer, I saw the problem. The cap on that middle bottle was not put on straight at the factory. Of course The Universe made sure that's the six-pack I grabbed off the shelf, and the one to turn over in the car.
Not such a bargain after all, I suppose. Seeing as how I didn't get 18 bottles for the $11, but only 17. A lost value of 61 cents. I figure there's still over $9 worth of retribution for my ill-gotten gains left before The Universe is done meting out justice.
Perhaps my debt to society will be paid when I return that shoplifted windfall to 10Box on Tuesday. Then I can return to my regular luck, and spill-free shopping.
I would take the bottle and receipt back the next time I went to that store.
ReplyDeleteI don't think that would benefit me. This is a store with high prices, usually only one cashier working, and mostly teenage employees. I have a feeling they would say it was a mistake by the manufacturer. I can't imagine them replacing the soda.
DeleteThen again, I'm not a very aggressive complainer. So some people might be able to get satisfaction.
Might try taking it back to the store with your sad tale of woe and see if they'll give you another six-pack. Naaaaahhhh!
ReplyDeleteYeah, not worthwhile to me, hauling a leaky soda six-pack on a 25-minute (one-way) drive, carrying it in from the end of the store where the handicap parking is, to wait for somebody to come to the service desk, and MAYBE get my 61-cents worth of satisfaction.
DeleteYou are too old to start shop lifting. My gr-daughters were about 5 and I bought them two bottles of Dollar Tree drink. When we got to the car, I opened Clara's, and it sprayed all over the car and me. She had apparently dropped a few times on the way to the car. A fine moment.
ReplyDeleteHeh, heh! I agree. I can't reap maximum rewards with such a late start!
DeleteThat Dollar Tree drink for the granddaughters probably contained enough sugar to make the clean-up a chore!
One leaky bottle isn't worth going back and making a fuss about. But check the caps next time.
ReplyDeleteYes, after a whole life of assuming store merchandise is suitable for sale, I will now begin inspecting caps and lids. After that jar of Sweet Banana Pepper Rings that had one hanging out the lid.
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