I'm sure you remember my continuing series, "Now Is the Time of Day When We Talk About the Most Recent Things You've Done Wrong." I was up to Episode 4 on May 1st, but curtailed the series, what with the exponential explosion of Hick's Fan Club! No, not really. I don't mind that Hick has a fan club. He just hasn't done anything major to warrant the next episode. Until...
Wednesday night, and by that I mean around 5:30 a.m. on Thursday morning, I came upstairs for bed. I went to FRIG II for some ice in my overnight (mid-morning) bubba cup. As part of my routine, I open the freezer and check to make sure the ice-maker lever is still in the "making" position. Not jutted out, with an errant scrap of ice frozen to the dispensing mechanism, or lifted by a single pile that has frozen together in the bin underneath it.
When I pulled on the handle, the door almost smashed into my face! It wasn't suctioned shut as normal. Huh. Something was blocking its closure. That something was the cheesecake that Hick got me for Mother's Day. Let the record show that I have not yet sampled it, but Hick has been going to town on it, as my mom might have said. More evidence of cheesecake shenanigans was the stickiness of the door handle.
Huh. I know Hick had been getting a piece regularly (heh, heh, shame on my 13-year-old self's sense of humor), but we'd had no problems with him closing the door. Something was off. I finagled the cheesecake around and made the door close again. I noticed that a block of hamburger I'd wrapped up had started to defrost on one corner. I surmised that the door must have been un-noticably ajar since Hick's nighttime snack around 9:00 p.m. The freezer had been unfreezing for about 9 HOURS!
All I could think, in my head, not out loud, was HICK! With the inflection Jerry used for NEWMAN!
Good thing I checked on the ice-maker! I had half a mind to lay into Hick as I lay down in bed. But no. I'd wait until the regular time of day for discussing the most recent thing he'd done wrong. At supper time.
When I rolled out of bed at 10:00, Hick was already gone on a mission seeking more merchandise for his Storage Unit Store. I commiserated with The Pony.
"Wait until you hear the latest thing your dad has done wrong! When I came upstairs for bed last night, the freezer door wasn't closed all the way! And the hamburger had started thawing! Dad left the door open when he had some of my cheesecake!"
"Ummm..."
"What does THAT mean? Did YOU have cheesecake?"
"Maybe?"
"Well. You left the door open. Good thing I didn't lecture Dad during the time of day when we discuss the most recent things he's done wrong! He would have denied it, and I would have called him a liar! I really hope you and dad are enjoying my Mother's Day cheesecake, the only gift I got, of which I have not yet partaken."
Later that night, The Pony was enjoying a bath in the big triangle tub. I told Hick,
"The freezer door wasn't closed when I came up for bed. Stuff was starting to thaw. I was all ready to blame it on you, but then The Pony admitted it might have been him."
"SEE? I'm not the only one who does things wrong around here. You need to talk to The Pony. He had TWO slices of your cheesecake!"
There's no honor among cheesecake thieves.
You could solve that problem by just throwing a towel over the cheesecake! Men never think to look under a towel for food.
ReplyDeleteHick hid it from ME first! In the crisper in the bottom of FRIG II. He wasn't being crafty. There wasn't room in the freezer. Short of wrapping it in foil on the bottom shelf, I don't have any other hiding places for cheesecake.
DeleteThat sounded like a nah-nyaa,nuh na na between the guys.
ReplyDeleteYou can actually keep cheesecake? You are amazing. I told my guy, "The clothes are still wet. Forget to turn on the dryer? Never mind I will do it." Then I had to say, "Sorry, the dryer went kaput." This time it wasn't his fault.
I hate it when that happens! I accused Hick of not dishing out the cat kibble that I feed the dogs as treats, but The Pony verified that he DID, and that the squirrels had eaten it all within six hours.
DeleteI'm with Linda: how the heck are you avoiding that cheesecake?
ReplyDeleteI keep FORGETTING about it! I mean to bring a piece down to the basement, put it in the mini fridge, and have it for a snack after supper. But I FORGET that it's there, and it's not worth climbing back up and down 13 steps to get it. Which probably speaks to the fact that I don't really NEED to have cheesecake!
DeleteHa Ha, just like a man, take the apology and straight away pass the blame. I'm glad you discovered the open door though, imagine the mess if you hadn't and how much food would have to be tossed to the dogs.
ReplyDeleteThat freezer is packed full! The dogs would explode if we gave it to them all at once. I suppose Hick's individual ice creams cups with swirls of chocolate and strawberry also melted, but re-froze. They're on the top shelf of the freezer door.
DeleteCould you have hidden the cheesecake in an emptied frozen broccoli bag? No man would look there.
ReplyDeleteHow did you refrain from plowing into the cheesecake?
First, I would have to buy some frozen broccoli. Second, I would have to eat the broccoli. THEN the bag would be available for cheesecake camouflage.
DeleteIf I'd have seen it in FRIG II, I would have taken a piece. Out of sight, out of mind.
I love cheesecake, so I do not blame either Hick, or pony, you are on your own with this one.
ReplyDeleteI am hoping there's still a piece left. Probably the plain slice, since the strawberry, and chocolate swirl, and "turtle" flavors go first!
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