That night, I was relaxing with a late dessert in front of my New Delly screen in my dark basement lair. Let the record show that I have been leaving the light on. Mmm...my cheesecake looked delicious. It was chocolate, with a kind of red mixture on top. Not an actual swirl, not an actual layer, but something red mixed with the chocolate. I assumed it was the Chocolate Cherry slice, judging from the label, and I had selected it specifically for that reason.
I was about halfway through my cheesecake slice, savoring it, watching a live slot play video, when it happened. I took a bite, and immediately chomped on something crunchy. Not so much crunchy as hard and unforgiving.
"Oh, CRAP!" I thought. "I've broken off a piece of tooth. On CHEESECAKE!" You know how that is, right? You're feeding away in a frenzy, and bite down on a shard of enamel. Okay. Maybe not. Maybe you took exemplary care of your toofers. But every now and then, a piece of mine cracks off from around a filling. I hate it when that happens.
I spit out the offending shard and put it on the plate. It was covered with chocolate, so I couldn't see an actual tooth piece, but what else could it be? I searched around my mouth with my tongue, but could not find the location of missing molar part. Huh.
Of course I finished my piece of cheesecake! Did I mention that it was delicious? I just chewed more gingerly. Still didn't feel any broken tooth.
THAT'S what was I spit out! Not the dime. It's just a random coin that I grabbed to show the size of the THING that I bit into in my Walmart cheesecake! After soaking it in water overnight, I think it's a nut shell. Or a cherry pit. Here's the other side of it.
That's pretty sharp, don't you think? It could have done some damage to my mouth! Could have actually broken a tooth! I told Hick that I should complain to Walmart and show them my broken teeth and say that's what did it. Just joking, because that could bring bad karma, to lie like that for my own personal gain. Hick said I should tell them I went into anaphylactic shock because I have a nut allergy, and that's a nut shell. Not sure if he was joking. Probably. It's hard to tell. Hick was born without a sense of humor, you know. And I don't think they've perfected a transplant yet.
Anyhoo...you can bet that I'm not throwing out the rest of the cheesecake.
In other news, yesterday my trip to town was bookended with a ladybug dive-bombing T-Hoe's driver's side mirror as I backed out of the garage, and a penny at my last stop. The ladybug was so fast that by the time I got my phone to take a picture, it had flitted away.
Here's the penny, though. A 1987 version. Not significant to me. It was right outside the gas station chicken store. It was NOT there when I went in. I'm always checking, you know. I was disappointed to find none. When I came out, my hands full of keys and 44 oz Diet Coke and two scratchers, I stepped over it and turned around, wondering how I was going to juggle that stuff in my hands to get my phone out.
I did it, though! I'm glad the woman and the man who separately entered after me did not come out and catch me, just in case they were the ones who dropped it. It was probably the guy ahead of me buying chicken, though. It was really my turn in line, but I waited and let him go ahead.
Even Steven seems to find a balance.
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This was penny #63 for my Future Pennyillionaire collection.
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I have the same toothy problem with odd bits breaking off around a filling, or sometimes even the old fillings breaking up and falling out :(
ReplyDeleteThat's definitely a cherry pit and I think you should inform the relevant bakery they need to be more careful, in case someone not so nice as you decides to sue them.
I suppose the thing to do would be to take a picture of the other labeling on that cheesecake package, like the bar code and numbers, so they can figure out what lot it came from, and send that, along with my PIT pictures, to the company that makes the cheesecake. I don't think Walmart would concern themselves too much, since they didn't MAKE the cheesecake.
DeleteThat's who I meant, the people who make the cheesecake.
DeleteGlad you didn't hurt your mouth on that sharp object. Maybe you should have mentioned this to the store where you bought it because someone has a quality control problem.
ReplyDeleteYou don't have to threaten to sue, but they ought to know!!
DeleteYes, I could tell the Walmart people. Don't cost nothin'. Except a wait in line at the service desk. But what if they want the REST OF THE CHEESECAKE? Heh, heh. If I tell them we ate it, they'll think that shard is not a big deal. I think there are still 9 pieces left. Or 8 if Hick had one after supper.
DeleteI don't know if it's worth the line wait to tell my tale. There might be WEIRDOS standing in that line ahead of me!
Sometimes you feel like a nut (like Hick)... Sometimes you don't. (I couldn't resist.)
ReplyDeleteLet the record show that Hick is here for our ridiculing pleasure. He doesn't mind. He's like those students who don't care if the attention they get is good or bad...just as long as they get the attention.
DeleteI definitely did not like the feel of THAT nut!
I'd be a little pithy about that pit and report it. I once found glass shards in my Coke bottle. In 1973, they sent a rep to my house who said, "Well your tongue would have prevented you from swallowing the glass. Here's a case of Coke. I was young and unassertive.
ReplyDeleteThat's the Big Time, a rep sent to your house.
DeleteToo bad you didn't also find a rat in your Kentucky Fried chicken! You could have saved yourself a few meal preparations, and served Coke and chicken for a week.
Hmmm...I thought I left a comment. I know all about that cracked tooth thing.
ReplyDeleteGreat title!