Here's a little gift, courtesy of the folks of Outer Backroadsia:
Yeah. People are d*cks. Just because you don't want your old stinky ugly couch doesn't mean the out-of-town folks want it. You might as well give us your muffin stumps. Or your toilet book, "French Impressionist Paintings." What we need is Rebecca DeMornay as a frontwoman to vocalize our cause. We don't want your charity, and we especially don't want your trash.
Or, to put the idea out there in Hick's words..."I don't know why people do that. They could have tossed it in the river and it would be gone by now."
I thought it was a rare couchalope hunkering down in the weeds.
ReplyDeleteJoeh--"Couchalope"? That's chuckle-worthy. I think that Val should include this in her "Down Home" dictionary...
DeleteJoe,
DeleteI hope you were wearing your hunter orange while you were scouting for rare couchalopes!
Sioux,
I think that would be a notable entry in my dictionary. Perhaps you should start your own dictionary. What do you call a corkscrew for screw-top wine bottles? A screwscrew!
I would have thought Hick would have picked that up to decorate one of his many "out-buildings".
ReplyDeleteYou don't know how close this was to reality!
DeleteOh, and, Val and Hick and Genius and Pony, HAPPY NEW YEAR!
ReplyDeleteThanks! We really did the town. Hick went to bed around 9:00, The Pony was in the shower at the stroke of midnight, and I was watching a DVR of "Little Darlings."
DeleteSending you New Year's greetings from Los Angeles to Outer Backroadsia!!
ReplyDeleteThank you. The ball dropped here two hours before you hit 2016. And the good news is: I wasn't even holding it in my hand!
DeleteNope. Not camouflaged. But maybe it was so ugly they couldn't stomach it being in their truck any longer.
ReplyDeleteI imagine it clashed with the green carpet I saw wadded up on their porch today. People really should truck their trash a little farther afield.
DeleteMaybe when Hick retires he can begin a private disposal company. People will call him to pick up their old stove, their nasty mattress, their broken-down sofa. If Hick doesn't want to drag it home for one of his outbuildings, he'll just toss it in the river.
ReplyDeletePure profit.
That is a most scathingly brilliant idea. Are you sure you were never a valedictorian?
DeleteHick saw it in the light of day this morning, and he said, "That was a perfectly good couch and love seat those people dumped by the creek!" He swore he didn't pick it up, but I had to drive to town anyway to make sure.
How tasteless and rude! The pattern doesn't even match the background.
ReplyDeleteYes! If it was a couchalope, Joe would have bagged it. A classic case of camouflage fail.
DeleteSome people! Perhaps they heard Hick was looking to furnish an out building. You know, one of those cushions would make a good bed for Juno.
ReplyDeleteOh, don't get me started! Once upon a time, Hick came home with a cushion for a dog's house...
DeleteSee next post for conclusion.
At least the scum bags around here make it to our dumpster with such. They have learned to do it under the cover of darkness, so as not to be seen by the crazy Nazi Bitch in the office. I hear that she will make you take it back or even throw stuff at your car .... just a rumor, maybe.
ReplyDeleteIf you had a goat, it would eat up half the furniture dumped in your dumpster under the cover of darkness...very environmentally-friendly, those goats.
DeleteAgain with the goats! No! Bo goats, He Who suggested we get a few to keep the grass mowed. I can just see goats running around the park, eating towels by the pool and creating havoc.
Delete